What do you do when the life you built completely falls apart? That’s the question New York Times bestselling author and podcast host Jen Hatmaker faced after her 26-year marriage ended and shattered everything she thought she knew. In the months that followed, she went from a shiny, successful leader — speaking to millions of women about authenticity and agency — to a mom of five trying to survive heartbreak, anxiety, and a life she no longer recognized. In this powerful conversation, we talk about how to begin again when the life you planned falls apart and the surprising freedom that comes when you stop pretending everything’s fine.
Jen’s new memoir, Awake, is out now.
Reality is reality, whether we are a willing participant or we’re pretending we can’t see it. So either we rise up to meet the truth, or it will rise up to meet us eventually. Share on XShow Notes
- Why Jen decided to write about the most painful chapter of her life (2:25)
- Examining the foundations she had built her marriage and life upon (7:44)
- How writing in nonlinear memories helped Jen make sense of grief, change, and rebuilding after loss (9:45)
- Transforming the most brokenhearted part of her story into community (11:29)
- What happens when we avoid hard truths (15:21)
- Choosing compassion over criticism and finding generosity for all the previous iterations of yourself (18:47)
- Trust yourself: you are a reliable narrator in your own story. (21:22)
- Understanding what codependency really is and how it shows up (25:45)
- The one question to shift: “Is this my responsibility?” (30:24)
- The beauty hidden in endings and how what feels like devastation at first can clear the ground for new growth. (35:47)
- Stop rushing your pain. (39:20)
- Grief and living are not binary. You can keep showing up for your life while still making space for healing. (43:57)
Resources / People Mentioned
- Awake by Jen Hatmaker
- For the Love with Jen Hatmaker Podcast
- Brené Brown
- Codependent No More by Melody Beattie
- Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris
- Bishop Michael Curry
Recommended For You
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- Glennon Doyle on Finding Your Brave
- Priyanka Chopra Jonas on Embracing Your Ambition
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